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Aiden nods quickly, seeming anxious as he turns for the door.
I catch his elbow.  Why can t he stay? I ask Cedrix.
 It s better if he waits outside. He scoots his chair forward, closer to the other chair.  He
can come back when this is all over.
I reluctantly release Aiden s arm and he gives me an encouraging smile, before
disappearing out the door.
I swallow hard and take a seat in a chair.  I feel like I m about to be tortured.
He takes a glass vial out of the cabinet, filled with a clear liquid.  The mind is an amazing
thing, really, he says, shaking the vial.  It really is. It stores things forever, even when we
sometimes want to forget& or when outside forces force us to forget.
 Forget me, for now, Monarch whispers.  But remember me later, when it s time.
I blink.  What?
 Outside forces, like the Highers, He clarifies, frowning.  Are you okay? You seem
different from the others that come in here.
 You keep talking about forgetting. I wrap my fingers around the armrests and rest back.
 Are you talking about blackouts, because sometimes it seems like things are missing from life.
 Like you wake up somewhere and can t remember how you got there? He asks, nodding.
 Yes, that s exactly what I m talking about. Did it happen to you a lot?
I consider this.  I can t remember. But it s a lie.
He nods, flipping my wrist over. Then he leans back and takes out another vial, one filled
with a purple liquid.
 I ve seen that before, I tell him.  Back in The Colony s hospital.
 And probably many times, he says and holds the vile up between his finger.  Because it s
what causes the little gaps in your memories.
I almost choke. Monarch put that medicine in me. Monarch erased my mind?
 Now Kayla, I m going to give you two options and I don t do it for everyone, only for
special cases like yourself, he continues.  Sometimes, people come here from The Colony, just
ordinary Bellators who just happen to be a talented fighter. But sometimes there are Bellators who
are different unique and for those I offer another choice. He flips the purple vile into the palm
of his hand.  I can make you forget everything, so that you can wake up believing this has always
been your life.
 Why would you do that? I bite at my thumbnail.  And what do you mean by unique? I
ask, wondering if he knows all my secrets.
 Unique in the sense that the things you re going to remember are going to be painful, he
says.  But it s your choice. Either I can inject the purple the radier into you and you can go on
your way, thinking this is how it s always been, or I can give you the clear the minte and we can
gradually start unwinding what s tangled up inside your head.
I notice the fact that the names of the medicines are spoken in the language of the Highers.
 I won t remember everything all at once?
He shakes his head.  It s a slow process, especially if your memories are painful. But like I
said, you can choose to forget, if you want.
 Were you a unique case? I ask and he nods.  And what did you choose?
He raises his missing hand.  I chose to remember.
It s like I ve been waiting for this moment my whole life and I know what I have to do,
without even thinking about it. I tap the clear vial with my finger.  I want to remember.
He presses his lips together and with a grave expression, nods.  Okay, then. He places the
purple vial back in the drawer, takes out a syringe, and stabs it into the vial.  Brace yourself,
Kayla he says and then inserts the needle into my arm.
My hands clutch onto the armrest. I suck in a breath of air as the clear medicine pumps
through my veins. I wait for my memory, but I can only see red.
Blood.
Blood everywhere.
I can t see through the blood.
I scream, but is it for real? Or in my head?
Pain. Pain surrounds me. My skin peels away as I claw at my own flesh.
Someone screams murder, not me, but a small child. I rock back and forth, grabbing at my
hair. Lights flicker on and off, the walls rattle there s so much blood.
 Make it stop! I cry.
Flashes of light, needles piercing. I can t breathe. I don t know who I am. Or where I am.
Then I see it: the red door. Watchers guard it. But I m inside, not out I m trapped.
Help, I want to scream, but my lips are sewn together. I raise my hands, blood covering
them. Not my blood. Someone else s.
A river of blood pours down from the ceiling and I drown in it.
I m screaming. My eyes are open, my gaze darting around the room. Cedrix. Aiden. They
are both restraining me. I knock them to their backs and am on my feet before either of them can
figure out what happened.
 What did you do to me? I breath loud, a breath that is not my own a fearful breath.
Cedrix holds up his hand.  Easy, Kayla, we re not going to hurt you.
I back for the door, shaking my head.  What was that?
 Kayla. Cedrix stands.  You need to calm down. I warned you that what you saw might
not be pretty.
 Might not be pretty. I tug at my hair, wanting to forget whatever it was I saw.
 Kayla. It s Aiden who speaks, soft and soothing.  Just give me your hand. It s all going
to be okay. No one here is going to hurt you.
I let go of my hair, realizing how bad I m trembling. I stare at his hand for a moment,
before taking it and the softness of his pulse soothes me.
He lets out a breath, flicking a glance at Cedrix.  I m going to take her to get something to
drink, he tells him.  See if I can get her to calm.
Cedrix nods, but points at my arms.  Clean her up first. We don t want anyone else to
know what s going on. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]